Ministry Through Mentoring

By Ch, Lt Col Cherri Wheeler

Mentoring is a word that either evokes fond memories of an effective and meaningful relationship or the horrors of a relationship gone awry. Mentoring can be a formal or informal relationship. It can take place among peers or as most often viewed as a person senior in age or position mentoring a person who is junior in age or position.

I have had the privilege over the last year to be in an informal mentoring relationship with several of the women chaplains in the DC area. We meet for lunch as a group every two months or so. The group includes active duty, Guard and IMAs. Over the past year I have had the opportunity to help colleagues prepare OPRs for their bosses and allow others to vent and process career opportunities or the lack therein. I have also listened to my colleagues pass on sage advice over lunch that was meant for the junior member yet it was a tool I tucked in my toolbox as well.

Having enjoyed this mentoring relationship, one in Colorado with the chaplains stationed in Denver and Colorado Springs, and at Pope with other women in leadership I realized the importance of professional women gathering periodically for personal, professional, and spiritual nurturing. At the 2008 Conference the topic of mentoring was brought up as a next step in realizing the goals of Women United in Ministry (WUIM). To that end, the WUIM would like to extend the opportunity for you to participate in a mentoring program; women chaplains mentoring women chaplains.

The concept is fairly simple and straightforward. We are looking for senior women (Majors through Flag Officer) who are willing to be mentors. Then we are looking for women (all grades) who want to be in a mentoring relationship. The executive board will help determine pairings based on a compatibility survey we will send to all participants. For instance, if being geographically close to the mentor is a number one priority then we want to match you with someone close; yet if being with someone who has similar faith or cultural background is more important that information can be inputted and will be given highest priority during the pairings. The bottom line, the WUIM leadership wants to match those who want to participate with the best possible mentor and will strive to match everyone’s priorities.

Once the pairings are made and everyone is notified the mentored person will make contact with her mentor and set the parameters of the relationship; how formal or informal, learning contract, goals/objectives, etc…. The basic understanding in all mentoring relationships is confidentiality of the members and no-fault clause which will allow either party to end the mentoring relationship during the next year or before the contract expires (in case of a formal learning contract). We would ask that if the relationship is terminated that it is accomplished professionally (let the other person know that it is over vs just not answering calls or emails.) We are a small group and want to continue to be a safe place for women chaplains to grow.